Growing up I adored my grandmother who we all called Granny. Her actual name was Maryann and she started me on my hat journey. Maryann (aka Granny) was an inspiring woman and to me she was very fashionable. She loved wearing hats with her very fabulous outfits. She shared her fashion, hats, and styles with me. Every year before school started she would take me and my sibilings shopping. She would buy each of us a new outfit for the school year. I remember one year she bought me these pink/purple/white sparkly boots that I thought were the coolest and I wore them all the time. I was so proud of those boots. Looking back on it all now I think my style and sense of fashion to this day reflects Granny's style. I looked up to her and wanted to dress like her. I loved her hats and one day she decided to give me one as a present. I think this was around 2nd grade or 3rd grade because I vividly remember wearing hats to school during that time. I think I got addicted after that.
I rocked stylish hats at school from 2nd grade until 5th grade, but as I got older things changed. What can I say, but middle school sucks. It was at this time I picked up on the fact that my classmates didn't think my hats were as cool as I thought they were. I don't really remember be bullied or anything like that, but I never really fit in. I also felt like I was the weird kid who loved hats. So I think with social pressures and the feeling that I needed to fit in I stopped wearing hats.
However things changed when Granny passed away right before my 8th grade year started. I had to find a way to honor her and keep her memory alive. I sometimes felt her spirit was alive in boutique clothing stores. I often called these type of stores Granny stores because it sold fashionable things that I knew Granny would love. I especially felt this way when I saw a hat store. When I would walk into these Granny stores or hat stores I would feel her spirit move through me. Sometimes I would stand in the middle of a hat store on the verge of tears. So my love of hats stayed alive beacause it kept the memories of my grandmother alive.
However I didn't start collecting hats and filling my closet with them until I was an adult with cash burning in my pockets. Eventually I was the math teacher I always dreamed of being and I was working in China. I was making pretty good money and figured as an adult I can spend it on whatever I want including hats. I started by buying some cute hats I saw on sale in China, but they were all reasonably priced and not that expensive. On my 25th birthday I took a trip to Shanghai and went shopping. I bought myself a few presents. I knew of this fancy shopping area which had a fancy hat store nearby. My mom and I found the hat store the year before when she visited. I knew from the year before that I would lose it in the hat store. So I told myself I would not go near the hat store. Then I told myself I would go into the hat store, but not buy anything. Then I went into the hat store and I swear I felt Granny's spirit tell me to buy a hat. Granny wanted to give me a birthday present from heaven is the way I saw it. However since I was the one actually spending money on it I was going to buy a hat that was reasonably priced and not expensive. I picked out a hat that I kind of liked that was probably 50$. I brought it to the back of the store where the register was and I was ready to pay for it. But then behind the register I saw this amazing hat. It was a beautiful shade of purple which is my favorite color. It had feathers, veiling/netting, leaves, and other cool decorations. I was in love and had to try the hat on. I took in the whole picture and the hat was fabulous. I knew I had to have it and asked the clerk about the price. I didn't need to convert to US dollars to know it was expensive. So I did some math in my head using quick conversions as well as what I would would be willing to pay for the hat (see math is useful). I barganied with the clerk to get the price down. I probably could have haggled more and got a lower price, but I didn't want to push too hard. I ended up paying about 200$ for this amazing purple hat which you can see me wearing down below.
I broke every rule I set for myself because I was not planning on spending 200$. It was all worth it because I had a hat I loved and I felt connected to my grandmother. I also decided from now on the most I will spend on a hat is 200$. I try not to spend the maximum often, but knew I needed a maximum. I only own one other hat that is 200$. I have looked at hats that turned out to be 400$, but once I heard it was over my maximum I put it back on the shelf. So I have at least stuck to my 200$ rule.
So in my adult years I started collecting and regularly wearing hats all over again. I had gotten addicted again or rather it never really went away. One year for Halloween I didn't know what costume to wear, so instead I got dressed up and wore a fancy hat. I just said I was dressed up as someone attending the kentucky derby and made a fake ticket to the derby. My hat collection got quite big and I always had to look for apartments that had lots of closet space. Often most of the shelf space in my closet was for my hats and I even would have one seperate closet that was full of hats. I think I learned a good and big closet was useful based on all that time I spent looking at Granny's closet while I was growing up.
Now flash forward to spring of 2020 when the pandemic started. I have a seven year long tradition of wearing a hat to school on Fridays. So at the start of the pandemic I found a way to continue this tradition. Every Friday I would dress up and put on a hat. I then would take a few selfies and post them on social media. I did this every Friday until I ran out of hats. While virtual school was happening I would post the photos on my online grade book. I posted them in a seperate place, so as not to confuse it with the academic posts. I wasn't sure if my students would actually see them or look at them since they were overwhelmed with online notifications. But I hoped it brought normalcy and brightness to my students. However I needed more to do to keep me distracted while stuck inside. Eventually a friend of mine suggested I learn to make hats. It seemed like a natural progression for my passion of hats. So I started by buying kits that came with all the materials I needed to make a hat specifically a fascinator. I got really into fascinators in the later years of my hat obession. Eventually I stopped buying kits and curated the materials myself. This means I was picking out fabric, bases, colors, and decorations. I found websites and stores that had the supplies I needed. Once I started having more control over the design and materials I couldn't stop making hats. Then I started researching different styles and techniques. I taught myself how to be a miliner. I found a lot of joy in coming up with ideas and making them come to life. When I am working hard and manipulating the sinamay fabric I think of my grandmother. I think of proud she would be of me for following my passions and creativity. I honor her memory and keep memories alive as I make hats.
My long term goal is to set up a store on Etsy to sell my creations. At this point I want to keep making hats, but don't have the closet space to keep them. So I am slowly buliding up to this store. I even have a name picked out which is Maryann's Millinery. As I was thinking of a name I knew it had to honor my grandmother aka Granny aka Maryann. I didn't need my name in the store title because I did not need the credit. So I decided to put Maryann in the title, but then needed something about hats. Millinery is a career and a milliner is a person who makes or sells hat. So I decided on Maryann's Millinery for the illteration. Stay tuned for updates about my store. However if you want to check out my creations then look for maryanns_millinery on Instagram.
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